I have a giant list of post ideas for my little blog, and sat down this afternoon with the intention of working through just that, but with our long-term travel adventure looming my brain has other ideas and this candid snapshot of thoughts came out instead!
Our adventure begins in about three weeks time, so it has been a hectic few weeks of organisation, finishing up projects at work, and managing to sell most of our stuff - and as to be expected not all has gone smoothly and easily. Last night was the first night I have slept for 8 hours in a looong time, and man, it felt good!
The best way I can describe my brain at the moment is like a blender on the pulse function - a mixture of feelings all whizzed up together in go-go-go mode! Every now and then though, I find myself completely calm with this content feeling that everything is going to work out fine. Which it will, of course, but there is plenty to do before then! My mind is playing tricks on me and it is all rather confusing!
I thought it might be a good practice to write down what's on my mind now so that hopefully, in a year or so, I can look back and laugh/reminisce about the silly things I was worried about at the time. Here goes my random brain dump...
I'm going to miss this place, and everybody that comes with it. I seem to have this problem that the minute I feel comfortable somewhere I have this urge to shake it up and do something outside my comfort zone. I love change, but it also terrifies me. I'm going to miss my perfect little house, my car (I had to say goodbye to it yesterday), my family, my friends, earning money, my part-time dog...at least I don't have to say goodbye to Alan!
What if I don't like travelling? I've backpacked for 3 months through Asia before, but never any longer than that. And I talk about travelling ALL the time. Will we come crawling back with our tails between our legs after just a month or so? Gosh, I hope not.
Will we get our to-do lists done before we go? I sure hope so! Aaaah brain overload, so much to do.
I am so excited to own hardly anything. We have sold SO much stuff. Our cars, all of our whiteware, furniture, plus lots of clothes and nick-nacky things. And it feels good! I'm worried about when we come back (will we come back?) how we will afford to buy the things we need, but for now it feels wonderful, and I am inspired to live a more minimalistic life. Hopefully this mindset lasts!
Everybody else is starting to spend money on responsible things, and I'm about to splurge my entire savings on travel. My Facebook feed is filled with friends buying homes, getting married, having babies, buying new pets, engagement rings and new cars. These are all things I want, but not just yet. Should I want that right now? Am I going to regret spending all of this money on adventuring through the unknown rather than a downpayment on a mortgage? Gosh, that sounds so serious. I'm confident in our decision to travel and I'm positive that we won't regret it - but my Facebook feed certainly doesn't agree with me!
I'm proud of how I've retrained myself in regards to my money. I used to never have a second thought about spending a day at the mall and purchasing essentially a new wardrobe, buying a takeaway coffee at the office each morning, or spending $10 or more on my lunch nearly every single day. Since January this year when I began saving for our holiday to Costa Rica, I have been so strict on myself when it comes to money. I haven't bought new clothes in months, nor a coffee, nor lunch. I pack my lunch every single day. I drink coffee that is provided for free in our staffroom. And I repeat outfits often. So what? I've managed to save a truckload of money! In this process I have also become great at budgeting, become a lot closer to my money and understand my financial position a lot better including my gigantic student loan and Kiwisaver.
I'm dying of anticipation! I'm eager to board that plane and turn all of my travel dreams into reality. This long-term trip has been in the back of my mind for more than 10 years, and I'm SO excited that the timing has finally fallen into place. We have a very basic plan, and I just can't wait to see how our adventures evolve as we discover new opportunities, meet new people, and become comfortable with life on the road.
Have you ever set off for a long-term adventure? What were your thoughts going into it?